Weird how I have grown so much in these last couple of weeks. Blogging does not seem to be that important to me right now. At first I thought coming over to the YMCA would be great. Checking email, blogging, and maybe do some weights. Just the opposite. I have been working on my mind and body, not so much on blogging. I fell great about myself. I lost almost 50 pounds since I quite drinking. Need to buy new clothes since my pants are falling off of me. Called SC to challenge her to a race. Put all this to the test, boot camp versus rehab. But its not versus, its a team effort. I couldn't of done these without her strength, your strength and mine, did I mention HP. in the early days of my recovery I felt alone. I found strength in all of you. I use your thoughts prayers and wisdom daily. I think about all your comments on my blog and others. I smile when I see "US" do things for others , like scout "borrowing" a key tag for meg, but not for herself. Prayers for the fallen, or ones that have strayed away from our tables. Prayers and angels sent to me the last couple of weeks.
I pray nightly for others not myself, not for what I need. Or what I think I need. If I need it God will see that I get it. I go back to the Doc Fri to finally get the results back from two weeks ago. Hope I didn't have 2 weeks to live. LOL I have a sense of humor, a real one without alcohol. So much seems to be real in my life now. I Helped my wife pack up last weekend to move out. So does need her space, it hurts, but if it was meant to be it will come back. If our marriage doesn't work, I gained a great friend in her. We have talked more like friends these last two weeks than we have in years honest conversions. Both of us talked not just me, and her listening. Honest truthful and a whole lot of tears. Today during my 2nd first step I was called a fake, minimizing my drinking. I let it go. Cried for an hour while talking in group. A bald 40 year crying like a 4 year old, something I needed to do years ago. Let it out. It felt great.
Well gotta run my time is up. Going to go hit the pool for 20 Min's before i have to be back. Still snow here in WI. Spring is right around the corner though, I can smell it in the air
Peace
Hugs and Kisses
Steve
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8 comments:
Steve you are sounding so strong and focused, good for you my friend! It almost sounds like a spiritual awakening. I am so happy that you are able to dump some crap now, a burden shared is a burden halved.
*HUGS*
Thanks for writing all of this Steve.
You sound like you're "getting it." Keep it up!!
oh steve.....i'm so proud of you.
you are so willing !!!!!
I shared your happiness, my friend. You're on the right track, I can ensure you that.
Happy weekend.
Steve, this is great, you are open to things. You are talking and listening and crying. This is all a part of the healing process. Congrats on the 50 lb weight loss! It will be fun to buy new clothes to show off your new svelt self! God bless you in your recovery.
Keep Coming Back, Steve!!! It is awesome to be part of your journey right from the start of it!!
Keep working those step, dude -- they are the solution for sure.
Peace and LOVE,
Scout
right on Steve, I am glad you are feeling good about this. It is such an awesome feeling to start to feel that relief!
Have a great swim and a great rest of your weekend
you are truly a blessing and inspiration sharing yourself with others here. i'm sure you're touching people's lives in ways you're not even aware of.
just wanted to say it is ok to pray for yourself in addition to praying for others. even though God knows what we have need of, it's ok to ask Him. whatsoever things you desire, when you pray, believe you have them, and you shall receive them. peace & blessings.
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