Coffee anyone?

Good morning its the un-godly hour of 1:30 pm. And I just started my first pot of coffee. Yes I know get my ass up and moving. Isolation is not good. I know,, I know,,I know, but I still do it. So back to coffee. If you want any go get it yourself, this is my program....lol..Oh I forgot this is also an honest program. I seem to have problem with coffee lately. My HP want me to get back or something. Sit back and enjoy this over you favorite flavor of coffee.

The time is about 6pm Thurs night. Sober Steve is busy trying to get the carpeting put down in his bedroom, so he can once again now the freedom of sleeping in a bed. His youngest son, the one who pic has visited this blog before, the one if he was the first child would of bin the only child. the child with a smile that makes you forget why you are mad at him. Steve goes to make coffee, the new goodwill coffee pot seems to spill on the counter when you fill it so lately Steve is using a water picture to fill. Be the true alcoholic that Steve is he is doing 20 things at once and the water picture overflows out the spout across the counter, all over the floor and stove. "Oh shi*" Steve yells. Gets the mop out, and cleans up the mess. No one was injured, its ok he thinks.

About an hour passes and Sober carpet laying Steve asks said child to go and get him a cup of coffee. "A" being the U.N. child is more than happy to help his father. He comes back with a cup and hands it to me with a devilish grin. Steve reaches for the comes and asks why it is empty. "A" tells his dad, "If you want coffee next time how about you use some water for it." Steve jumps over the carpet and chases the child around the house till he is trapped and gives him the water. So lets try this again Steve thinks. I will be smarter this time he says. Uses the coffee to fill it, spills water again, but picks it up. Goes back to the carpet detail, smells the coffee about 45 mins later. No child to fetch it this time. He goes and gets it himself. "Oh shi*, what else can go wrong with this simple task tonight."

For this time When Sober (dying for a cup of coffee) Steve tried this time he never put the pot under the maker. It has that stopper thing a magiggy that stops the coffee till the pot is under it. Well it made 12 cups of coffee the filter holds about 3, so yes you guessed it the rest of the coffeee and grounds all over the counter, stove and floor. I big fricking mess for Steve to pick up, but he laughed, said child came by and laughed, and the two of them went and sat on the couch and laughed and watched TV.

So today I look back and reflect about how far I have come in this program. At first I thought about how using using the steps and the program of AA helped me with this one. Well it is evident that my HP didn't think I needed anymore coffee. I didn't get mad and blame anyone else. I didn't get made and throw things. I realized that I made a mistake, I'm human and I forgave myself. things happen, drunk or sober, some good some bad, but nothing is really worth picking up that first drink over. The most important thing i did about that whole thing was the ending, sit down and enjoy my sons company, not working with him but sharing my time with him. Enjoy the little things in life they may end up to be the biggest thing in your life todAAy.

Peace
Hugs and kisses
Steve

PS. This was not my first post for today. I delted the first one saying that I didn't feel like posting, because all I can do lately isolacte and kick myself,,,,etc,,bad day

just todays reading in a book someone gave me "Daily Meditiation Is for MEN"
We've had problems in our lives with limits. We have done some things to excess and others we have endlessly postponed. Sometimes we haven't had good judgement about what we ought to tell someone or whom we ought to tell. We may have kept secerts that made us lonely and sick. other times we exposed too much inappropiate situations and hurt someone else or ourselves. Developing these internal limits is a quiet change that comes with recovery. Gradually, we gain a stronger feeling of self-respect and become more intuitive about when to express something and when not to.

Secerts are links in our chains of bondage toisolation, addiction, and codependency. Yet, when we are compelled to tell everything, we lack feeling of self containment that comes from maturity. We need a sense of privacy which is the freedom to choose what and when to confide in a friend. What does our intution tell us today about our privacy and our openness?
Today ... I will Listen to my inner messages about what i need to discuss with others and when I need to withhold